April 17, 2007 at 3:18 pm #3454
I tend to live by a lesser standard when I’m just at home too. But I’ve found you do have to be prepared to answer the door, even then.
Here’s a curiousity question for you: Do you have “Sunday” clothes?
I tend to keep one dress each season as my Mass clothes but my daughter (25) would be embarassed (maybe enough to stay home!) if she only had one thing to wear to Church. I was raised to think of them as my “special” “honoring” clothes, but what DO people think now?
I also know a family who had “festival” clothes that matched, that they wore only on special feasts. Parents and boys and girls all had matching plaid vests which they wore with white tops and navy pants or skirts. It was great for family pictures of course and practically it helped them find all their children at weddings and first Communion parties and such. They sort of let it go when their oldest got to high school age.April 17, 2007 at 4:24 pm #3455
If I do wear something different, it’s just a skirt.April 18, 2007 at 1:34 am #3456
I have some dressier things I reserve for Sundays and special occasions. I just found a bunch of really cute long draw-string skirts at old navy. They’re nice and long, but still cool for summer. They also have tees in a bunch of different colors, but you have to find the table of tee’s with the high neck otherwise they’re not so modest for me b/c I’m short so I have to be a bit more careful about neck lines. They’re fitted, but not clingy. I just bought mine a little big to account for shrinkage.
I don’t know what to do about a swimsuit this summer. My in-laws just bought a beach place, plus we have a pool in our backyard now. I don’t want to not swim with my boys.April 18, 2007 at 12:30 pm #3457
I fairly big-chested and I’ve been able to make bathing suits work. Any time, though, that I felt perhaps it wasn’t going to remain modest the entire time, I simply put another shirt on over my bathing suit and swam in it.
Remember, modesty extends beyond the clothes we wear, it has a lot to do with how we present and carry ourselves.April 18, 2007 at 6:25 pm #3458
I have Sunday and Special occasion clothes, mostly just because they’re nice and I don’t want to ruin them. Swim suits are hard. I have a maternity suit right now. It’s two piece but it hangs low so my middle section doesn’t show and it ties around my neck. It’s very nice. I bought it after my miscarriage so I could nurse my little guy comfortably while we were on vacation in Mexico. I like Old Navy’s clothes – that’s were almost all my stuff comes from! =) AndreaFebruary 26, 2008 at 3:28 pm #3459
As with most things, it’s a question of balance. You don’t want to go to one extreme or the other. I tend to see more of the “extreme modesty” side since I attend the latin Mass. One woman even comes dressed in what I can only call a burka! It’s one thing to be modest, quite another to deliberately make yourself unattractive. After all, caring about the beautiful (in art, dress, etc) is one of the best qualities in women.March 5, 2008 at 12:34 am #3460
Sometimes I think the muslim women have the right idea. Men cannot stare at their chests or butts when they cover up like that. Also, you cannot be vain about your hair if it is covered. Like nuns. They wear very modest dress also. Should we all walk around like that — no. But it really makes you think.March 8, 2008 at 1:27 am #3461
The complete covering of muslim women has more to do with their religion (they are covered because they are viewed as property), and not modesty.
If I’m ever wondering if what I’m wearing is modest, I ask my husband.
The Corinth women covered their heads out of custom, not out of modesty.March 13, 2008 at 4:19 pm #3462
A lady I once worked with said that when she was newlywed to her husband (a Human Resource manager) she asked him if what she was wearing for work was appropriate. He replied “If you have to ask then it isn’t!” It makes sense, if you question it at all then it is probably on the short side or on the low-cut side and so some people will perceive it as inappropriate.March 13, 2008 at 10:26 pm #3463
This might be a shocker to some but I wear a 2 piece swimsuit 😯 ! I am a very conservative woman but when I am at the pool, it’s for a reason. If I walk to the consession I do put a cover up on but when Asher is playing in the kiddie pool with his friends, it is a wonderful opportunity for me to put the reclining lounge chair (its aloud) in the water with him and relax while getting a little color…sunscreen on my face though, dont want wrinkles! This might relect (as I’m sure most will think) my age (27) but I personally don’t see anything wrong with that. Now, if I get stretch marks after the one I’m carrying, a 2 piece will probably be a thing of the past!
In everday life I try not to let my breasts show which isnt much of a problem for me since I am small chested. But my jeans fit and all of my shirts are fitted…not tight. If my husband and I go out for a nice dinner, I might wear a dress that goes above the knees with some high heels…he’s a leg man and rarely gets to see me dressed up anymore and I want to please him and keep his his eyes glued to me. It’s nice to hear a “Wow” when you come out of the bedroom from getting ready. I’m not sure I would get that response from him if the dress were baggier and didnt make me look beautiful in form and figure. I wish I could post a pic for you from one of our date nights so that you can have a better understanding as to what Im talking about. Church attire might be a tad different from “date night” attire, there might be a few more inches on the dress but I generally wear slacks with a nice sweater or short sleeve top.
With all that taken into account, I also dont want to be the cause for another man’s lust…that is why I feel I have found a happy medium. No matter what I wear, it could never compare to the clothes I see other women in, I’m pretty sure the other men would be looking at them and not even noticing me. I mean, why look at me when there is always another woman in the room that probably has her areola about to show or has gone “Britney Spears”! Which reminds me, my husband was on a plane last year with a bunch of guys from work and in a came a woman trying to catch her flight at the last minute in a red low necked dress and her nipple had popped out! No one else would tell the “poor girl” except for my honorable hubby! She quickly tucked it away and turned about as red as her dress…God knows I never want to worry about being that girl.March 14, 2008 at 2:38 pm #3464
Just because you dress nicely and another man notices is not your fault. We are not Arab and women are NOT responsible for a man’s thoughts, the man is, he can turn away and think of his wife. It is quite another thing to dress immodestly (temptingly), with everything that belongs in the bedroom hanging out, than it is to dress looking your best, i.e. not baggy, oversized or sloppy! I firmly believe in dressing to feel confident and good about yourself. We do not need to hide the bodies that God gave us, we DO however need to be modest and respectful of those bodies!!
I am a huge advocate of the late Pope’s Theology of the Body. Christopher West gives his “crash course” on the Pope’s writings in Naked Without Shame, a lecture series. I posted the information in the Book Discussion topic. He talks about society acting like animals (immodest, sex-driven) but then also going to the other extreme (just as wrong!) and trying to act like angels — dressing to hide our body, basically being ashamed of our body and attempting to deny our sexuality. Our body is a part of us and God made us, we have a responsibility to take care of our body and love ourselves as God loves us!March 16, 2008 at 8:41 pm #3465
Nicely put MommyRose. It was actually The Theology of the Body that led me to the Catholic Church. I thought to myself, “Okay, maybe those Catholics have at least one thing right!” Here I am almost 8 years later a devout Catholic, THANK YOU HOLY FATHER!April 18, 2008 at 7:58 pm #3466
I was raised in the Baptist faith, and their idea of modesty is much stricter than the Church’s. Two piece bathing suits were considered very sinful.
I struggle with knowing if something is modest or not, and I’ll often be wearing something in the house that I think would only be appropiate in the house, and my husband will comment that it’s modest enough to wear in public. Then there’s times where I’ll be wearing something that would be modest in public, but not in church.
I’m glad to have a husband who is very honest with me, and has a good sense of what modesty on a woman looks like!
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