Age

This topic contains 6 replies, has 7 voices, and was last updated by  cincyamy 4 years, 11 months ago.

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  • #2229

    What do you guys think is a good age for marriage?

    -Melissa

    #3861

    It depends on the person and what they’ve been through. But I would say in general, most people are not ready until they are 24-25. I was 22 and wish I would have waited a little bit longer. My plan was to wait until I was 24, but we had already been dating 3 years and knew we wanted to get married someday. My dad, who I was living with at the time, decided to get remarried, and his wife inconveniently moved all my stuff out to the garage one day while I was at college. When I came home I felt I had to move out but I still had a semester left of college so was only working part-time. My then fiance was working full-time but we both DID not want to live together before we were married so he bought a mobile home and helped me pay for it for a few months until we got married and he moved in (he was still living with his parents at the time).
    I would have loved to live by myself for a year or two but everything just kind of got pushed on me to get married. I am glad we waited 5 years to have our first child though. We got to do a lot of fun things as a newly married couple as well as buy our first house. I think that having kids matured me WAY more than getting married.

    #3862

    It all depends on the maturity of the person. Some are mature enough, and ready, to be married at 17, and others may never reach that level of maturity.

    #3863

    ashersmomma
    Member

    I agree, it depends not only on the person but also on the relationship of the couple and their hearts toward God. My husband and I got engaged only 3 months after we started dating, then married 3 months later…we were 22. My husband was in the Nat’l Guard, going to college, and was working in the produce department at a grocery store. I was living with 2 friends off campus while going to college and working. In our case, however stereotypical it may sound, it was trully a case of “when you know, you know” I knew by our 2nd date that he was the one I was suppose to marry. There were alot of “signs and wonders” that led me to that conclusion, along with deep prayer and everything was so perfectly orchestrated by God.

    I mentioned that he was only a grocery clerk for a reason. I probably should have had some reservations about his ability to be a good provider, but I didnt. It’s not that I was blind with love, I jsut knew the man I was marrying had so much potential and would stop at nothing to reach his goals. So many couples wait to get married for so many reason, one of the biggest reasons is money. I hear, “Well, when we get out of college” or “when we can buy a house”. If you truly think that he is the man that God has planned for you, how could age, money, or anything else get in the way of that. And in the postponement of the wedding bells for the “perfect situation” there are more occasions of sin and the relationship starts to deteriorate before they even say “I do” and that is probably not the plan God originally had. I trusted God’s will for us and I am so thankful I did.

    My sister just celebrated her 1 year anniversary last October and she is just turning 21 this month. They also got pregnant on their honeymoon and just bought their first house. My sister and her husband asked me to be their sponser this year for RCIA!!! They are deciding to become Catholic!! Her husband once vowed never to step inside a Catholic Church and here he is coming to our faith! This is a beautiful example of a couple who knew themselves and their heavenly Father enough to trust in Him completely…and God continues to bless them. I don’t know if there is ever a “right” age, but a right relationship with God and 2 righteous people.

    #3864

    gooeyrn
    Member

    I think everyone is different. I married at 25 and it was a good age for me. I don’t think it would have had good results for me if I would have married prior to age 23-24ish. I met my dh when I was 19. We were together 6.5 years prior to marriage. I knew he was the one, but I was just not ready to go through with it at that age. Everyone is different, though.

    #3865

    born2beamom
    Member

    I was ready at 16. Sounds young but I was. I believe we’re all different. I just knew my calling from when I was a young child in elementary school. I was born to be a wife and a mom. I never ever had a doubt

    #3866

    cincyamy
    Member

    I’d say age isn’t as important a factor as life experience.

    If you’ve dated several people that gave you a well-rounded understanding of what you would need/want in a spouse, and are ready to be independent – which includes having received as much education as your vocation necessitates, then you may be ready for marriage.

    I read somewhere (Matthew Kelly maybe?) that people marrying young shouldn’t be frowned upon, necessarily. If the couple truly believes it is meant to marry, then why wait? I look at this idea with reservation, because who is to say an 18 year old is mature enough to understand true love? (Heck, some 50 year olds don’t understand it!)

    That’s just my take. I got married at 25 and the timing couldn’t have been more perfect.

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