My heart is so saddened for both of you ladies!! What a loss of trust in your marriage, such sorrow and betrayal, this is a very heavy burden that tortures your mind and your heart! You will both be in my prayers that you find peace! Remember that God only gives us burdens that we can bear, although the pain may seem more than you can bear now if you trust in God with time he will lead you to forgiveness and you will become stronger and better women.
I pray that you find someone’s shoulder to cry on, someone you can confide the tortures that you go through. Have the strength to talk to your husband. He has broken his sacred marriage vow and he will have to do everything in his power to regain the trust in your marriage. He needs to go out of his way to do nothing suspicious. He will also need someone to talk to. I can only imagine that he must bear a heavy burden too. Both of your husbands sound like good men who truly regret what they have done. Be thankful that your burden is not the same — to now see the harm he has done to his marriage and to see how he has broken the heart of the one he loves, the person he gave his self to for the rest of his life, the person who should trust in him and confide in him the most is now broken-hearted and feels alone and betrayed, all because of him. This burden must be very heavy to bear indeed!
May the Lord be with all of you while you mourn, may he lead all of you to a place of forgiveness and trust in each other that your marriages might be stronger for the trials that you have overcome together. I pray for you and all who have suffered such a betrayal.