I see what you’re saying and I appreciate it. But, do you consider it a disrespect that the husband wouldn’t even consider what the wife was saying, or trying to understand her point of view?
I feel very blessed that my husband would probably second guess himself (as would I second guess myself) if one of us disagreed with the other vehemently over a particular topic. It would open a dialogue over the issue so a joint decision could be made rather than simply stating, “I’m a man, I’m the boss, end of discussion” whenever there’s a difference of opinion. Quite often, in our home, one of us will say outright, “You’re absolutely right. I wasn’t looking at the entire issue.” BUT…..we need to have good reason for it.
Keep in mind that we are ALWAYS very respectful, and our discussions over issues NEVER have an argumentative tone to them.
My DH himself would be the first to tell you that our decisions are unanimous or no decision is made at all. Even the most prayerful man is not always right just because he is a man. (And DH is one of the most prayerful men I know!) Our priest on Sunday said it best when he said that not everything in the Bible is meant to be interpreted literally.
If you ask him, DH would say his understanding of Catholic teachings comes from a Jesuit education (he says they’re known for being somewhat liberal? ) He’s one of those “Exploring faith at the height of Vatican II” Catholics. So…maybe he is a bit more liberal in this regard than other husbands. I couldn’t have married anyone any different though.
BTW….I had a rather prominent, public career (in broadcasting) when we got married, DH and I discussed two issues: 1) Change of name or no change for me and 2) Do I work or raise the children. I chose to change my name (We are two becoming one! I wanted to show it!) I also chose to raise our children as I wanted to experience every moment of God’s greatest gift. DH felt as though he had no right to insist upon a name change, but wanted 50 % say in the child rearing issue. We happened to agree totally.
Also wanted to mention….I have literally been pregnant for most of our entire marriage (We’ll have five children under seven – one just turned seven so it’s actually closer to five children under six!)
I pretty much fit the old fashioned wife stereotype! It’s just that my DH doesn’t fit into his role neatly!
I enjoy this discussion. I’m curious to know your ages, as I wonder if this is a generational difference of opinion with regard to what we feel the Church asks of us as women? I know my MIL is very much of the same opinion as you. OK…I’ll go first….I just turned 36. DH is 40.